The Yellow Window of The Night

The night I first met her

She sat by the window

Hugging her legs close

Chin tucked between her knees

Humming a certain melody

The same one that played on the stereo

The one that I was accustomed to

Just like I was to him, of my past

On me I’d let them both grow

The boy and the melody

Like on walls grew fancy ivy.

This Girl I met

She sat there

Oblivious and serene

Unflickering and graceful

Just humming a melody

As I listened close

with my wrecked heart

And my conflicting brain

Both powerlessly dragged back to a memory

Of us, him and I,

Our laughter in the air intertwined

Eyes crinkled, Cheeks dimpled

Before suddenly

It’s all distorted by reality.

So I couldn’t sleep, just couldn’t

That was the first night I met her

At an odd hour,

Listened for a soul-soothing calling

Sitting by the window

Humming just for her

There was a sense of

familiarity about her

Like she’d always been

Right here

In a glass sheet separated universe

Like she lived in a parallel reality

As a better version of me

And she didn’t talk too much

Or at all,

But she said a lot more

Than I’d consciously ever expressed

And yet she had these guarded layers

That she’d never let you peel off

At least not as easily as I would

She was stronger like that

And less easily deceived

You see, her layers grew over

Miles of experiences

And ages of time

To shelter her from the crookedness of Love

and it’s painfully disgusting acquaintance- Doubt

Yet like me,

She reeked of wanting to be experienced

Her creases and curves to be remembered

Before she was wholly consumed

This girl I met,

I met her every night after

So I could heal

And maybe someday again

experience laughter

Because she knew it all

And was at peace

She was the fine line between

A  loud hooting night owl

An ambitious soaring morning eagles

She was at peace

The kind that our world would

struggle to even comprehend

This girl I know from so recently

She reached out to help me

At a desperate time of need

But know this

She’s always lived in me

You’ve probably spoken to her

If you’ve had a conversation with an intoxicated me

Or post 1am when most others are asleep

I wake up and regret it all

Apologise and walk around not standing too tall

Only because the tinge of golden

Of broad daylight

Did me more wrong and

Made me more hopeless

But this girl I met every night

At her yellow window of a quieter time

She looked into my eyes and found poetry

She loves me

And that’s how she was all I had

My faith in human form

This why I stay awake all night

For the reassurance that she lives

My faith in me

And if I didn’t

I fear all else would hang on a string.